Monday, August 25, 2008

Survivor

Once i was asked in a truth or dare game...Where do you see yourself 5 years from now..and as i was in a blue mood at that moment...my answer was " i will be half lying in my bed...it is dark...books are around me...the laptop in my lap..and i will be thinking..how did i reach here?"

When i look back at that statment , i realize how we sometimes impose and decide in advance how our future is going to be ? We subconciously give in to our black thoughts and we - again - subconciously allow it to manifest...we help it come true..and then we go like " See i told you so...i told you it will happen "

The truth that we dont realize...is that we really do create our future..we create 90% of the events that happen with us...

Back to the statement above , somewhere beyond my concious i was making it come true...i was being so picky on my friends...and somehow i found excuses not to get in touch with them...i isolated my self from everyone...i hated my job and stoppped searching for any creativity in it which intensified the feeling of boredom...i blamed my loneliness on life and faith..and yes..that day i was sitting alone in my room thinking " how did i reach here?"

It scared me like hell...the alarms rang in my head..and i realized i dont want this...i dont want to be lonely...i dont want the books and some internet to be my friends...this is not me....and there only there i realized that i made it happen , i created all the circumstances to materialize a vision...why? because it is easier...it is easier to be sad, lonely and blame faith...it is easier to give up than to fight...

We were born with instincts of surviving...we want to survive... but sometimes laziness and chosing the easy way masks it...and we stop surviving...we just give in....

I want to survive ...it is clear...pure..real...and i will survive...

1 comment:

NasEr said...

cool! now u know it .make it change .